Berlin Fashion Week How To:
Prep: Do some coke and don’t eat for at least 1-2 weeks until you look sufficiently hungry .
1. Go on iTunes and look for the band with the weirdest name. Put on their music.
2. Go to your grandma’s and your little sister / brother’s closet and pick things that do not match in any way. Make sure they do NOT fit you.
3. Put on all the garments you picked, from biggest to smallest.
4. Be sure to wear at least one item that does NOT go with the season. So, if its winter, wear strappy sandals. In summer, wear fur, a hat or a big scarf.
5. For some extra fashion spice, try to bring pieces from at least 3 decades into one outfit.
6. Do some more coke.
7. While you put on your lipstick, work on your Swedish accent.
8. Once you’ve got your accent down, put on the most ridiculous sunglasses you have and do some more coke.
9. To fit in with the crowd, try to talk about bars as much as you can. If you don’t know any, make one up, preferably in another town where everything is cooler. The others will be impressed with how “underground” and “authentic” you are.
10. Good to go! Don’t come back!
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